As many people can maybe probably tell, I am a big fan of IQ tests. I think they are the most logical tests in the world, and how smart you are can definately be summed up by a few questions about unrelated nothingness. Now, I don't know if you realised, but I was being sarcastic, IQ tests test nothing but how much time you feel like wasting doing one. But, all is good, because I have devised my own IQ tests to beat all IQ tests. Answer the questions (Multiple choice) and take down oyur answers, and check them against the correct answers in the comments on this blog post. Now you will see what your real IQ is.
Question 1:
How many characters have I typed in this post so far?
A- 256
B - 196
C - 336
D- Can't be bothered counting.
Question 2:
Which, of the following, is the closest in relation to a Pangolin?
A- A tape worm
B- A tapier
C- Measuring tape
D - A farmer's hat
Question 3:
How many questions are there in this quiz?
A- One
B- Three
C- Five
D- Alfragooglewak
Question 4:
Which of the following characters has not appeared in a poem on my magnificent blog?
A- Fred
B- Xark
C- Bob
D- Alfragooglewak
Question 5:
How many of this quiz's correct answers are "C"?
A-None
B- Four
C- Three
D- Alfragooglewak
Now, read the comments, add up your score, then read the section relating to you.
PEOPLE WHO SCORED 5/5:
You are very intellectual. You should be in a hospital earning a high revenue, since you attained an ENTER score of above 99.95 in High School, and spent you University time studying Medicine. Congratulations on earning such a high IQ score. Your IQ is 250.
IF YOU SCORED 4/5 FOR THIS TEST:
You are fairly smart. But why did you get that fifth question wrong? You got it wrong because you are not as good as everybody else. Go and sit in a corner and think about what you have done. Out of interest, which question was it that you got wrong? Because if it was question 5, that is terrible. That was the easiest question of them all! Your IQ is 50.
READ THIS IF YOU GOT THREE ANSWERS RIGHT:
Hi! Thankyou for doing this test. Please, now, return to you class and learn your times tables a bit better. Ok? You should not be wasting this time reading blogs when you clearly need to get a bit more cleverer. You got an IQ score of 5.
GOT TWO ANSWERS CORRECT? CLICK HERE FOR A FREE HOLIDAY TO FIJI!
You clicked on the title, didn't you? Yes, you did. I think it is time for you to take a good look at your life. You only got two right, that's less than half! Go and buy some ice cream and have some fun with your friends for a while. You deserve the break, as you must have worked very hard to read the questions of this test. You have an IQ of 1.09 x 10^-519. Sorry if you cannot understand that number.
GET ONE RIGHT?
Yay! You get right! You could smart, but you not get much right. Hard test. Hope done more good next time. Let be friend. You want be friend, too? You get eye and koo for zero.
Notice for parents: DID YOUR SON/DAUGHTER GET NO ANSWERS CORRECT?
This is a problem. This is a big problem. You have done a great job of parenting! (That was rather sarcastic) Unfortunately, your child has an IQ of negative five billion, and you should let them know that their ideal profession when they get older will be a chicken trainer.
Sorry if, in any way, your score has insulted you. Maybe next time you will get a 5/5 and feel better.
Monday, October 22, 2007
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Alphabentance
A Bad Crocodile Didn't Eat Fruit, Get How In Jail, Kate Lent Monopoly Non-Oblong Pieces, Quickly Rewarding Stupid Tabatha Under Veils With Xylophones Yelling "Zebra"?
...Awesome. No, I am not bored right now, don't be ridiculous.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Schoolface
Now that school is coming to a close for me, I am realising a lot within the system of school (or at least my school) that is rather stupid, and I hadn't realised before. Maybe I had realised these things earlier, but that is not important.
Firstly, why does everybody in school write with blue pens? How ridonculous. Why don't they publish novels with blue ink? Because blue is a stupid colour to have text in, which makes blue pens seem all the more a waste of pigment. Black pens, on the other hand, or white pens, they are smart. Use them. Now.
Why do we have to wear school uniforms, like blazers and what not, which are quite formal, while teachers can wear jeans? Unfair unfair unfair. And if we are meant to be learning, in school, how to live and survive in the outside world, why are we not learning about how to dress in the outside world? Are they really teaching us to dress in blazers and shorts with mismatched colours sprinkled all over them?
Why do some teachers only want to talk about maths, or English or physics, I am sure there are much mroe interesting things they would rather talk about, like how their day has been, and why they are wearing jeans instead of short shorts and knee-high socks.
When analysing written material in English, why do we always assume the writer put meaning into every single word they churn out? I'm sure, just once in a blue moon, they put a word into their writing because it fits in a sentance, or because it is just there. Let's analyse what I just said. I used the word: "Single" before, meaning I am subliminally telling the reader that the words used by writers (which are rather professional words) are single, and not married, which means I am addressing the global issue of professionalism vs. happiness in life. How stupid. I did not mean that, I said single because it means "single". Stupidhead.
Why does our entire school life get summed up by the exams at the end of year 12? Because people are lazy, and cannot be bothered looking back on how we went in previous years, that's why. And also because year 12 is the year before university, and the ENTER score gets you into university. This means they should have scores to transfer to the next level, like a STAY score in year 9, where if you get really high, you can go to a better school for year 10, or if you get low, they send you to Poowong West Primary School for the rest of your life.
Schools are also all about promoting individuality, and bringing out the best of each individual person, and meeting their individual needs. They are so much into individuality and the difference of each student, that they call me by my new, and very individual name: 85344413T.
School is ridiculous, in many ways. But I love it. I may die next year, without school. But we will see.
Firstly, why does everybody in school write with blue pens? How ridonculous. Why don't they publish novels with blue ink? Because blue is a stupid colour to have text in, which makes blue pens seem all the more a waste of pigment. Black pens, on the other hand, or white pens, they are smart. Use them. Now.
Why do we have to wear school uniforms, like blazers and what not, which are quite formal, while teachers can wear jeans? Unfair unfair unfair. And if we are meant to be learning, in school, how to live and survive in the outside world, why are we not learning about how to dress in the outside world? Are they really teaching us to dress in blazers and shorts with mismatched colours sprinkled all over them?
Why do some teachers only want to talk about maths, or English or physics, I am sure there are much mroe interesting things they would rather talk about, like how their day has been, and why they are wearing jeans instead of short shorts and knee-high socks.
When analysing written material in English, why do we always assume the writer put meaning into every single word they churn out? I'm sure, just once in a blue moon, they put a word into their writing because it fits in a sentance, or because it is just there. Let's analyse what I just said. I used the word: "Single" before, meaning I am subliminally telling the reader that the words used by writers (which are rather professional words) are single, and not married, which means I am addressing the global issue of professionalism vs. happiness in life. How stupid. I did not mean that, I said single because it means "single". Stupidhead.
Why does our entire school life get summed up by the exams at the end of year 12? Because people are lazy, and cannot be bothered looking back on how we went in previous years, that's why. And also because year 12 is the year before university, and the ENTER score gets you into university. This means they should have scores to transfer to the next level, like a STAY score in year 9, where if you get really high, you can go to a better school for year 10, or if you get low, they send you to Poowong West Primary School for the rest of your life.
Schools are also all about promoting individuality, and bringing out the best of each individual person, and meeting their individual needs. They are so much into individuality and the difference of each student, that they call me by my new, and very individual name: 85344413T.
School is ridiculous, in many ways. But I love it. I may die next year, without school. But we will see.
Monday, October 15, 2007
Fresheriser
Argh! I have not blogged in so long! I am sorry for all those who actually have died because I have not blogged. That maybe nobody, or everybody.
It is my last the begining of my last one and a half weeks of school... forever. Fun.
Well, I felt like I should at least try and get a blog down on paper for now, to keep my site looking fresh, however rotten it is getting at the moment. And The school bell is going to go in a matter of seconds, so I cannot write more. I will definately try to get back into blogging some more. And commenting on other people's blogs.
SERIALDRAMA.COM!
Go there... now.
It is my last the begining of my last one and a half weeks of school... forever. Fun.
Well, I felt like I should at least try and get a blog down on paper for now, to keep my site looking fresh, however rotten it is getting at the moment. And The school bell is going to go in a matter of seconds, so I cannot write more. I will definately try to get back into blogging some more. And commenting on other people's blogs.
SERIALDRAMA.COM!
Go there... now.
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