Monday, October 22, 2007

IQ Test!

As many people can maybe probably tell, I am a big fan of IQ tests. I think they are the most logical tests in the world, and how smart you are can definately be summed up by a few questions about unrelated nothingness. Now, I don't know if you realised, but I was being sarcastic, IQ tests test nothing but how much time you feel like wasting doing one. But, all is good, because I have devised my own IQ tests to beat all IQ tests. Answer the questions (Multiple choice) and take down oyur answers, and check them against the correct answers in the comments on this blog post. Now you will see what your real IQ is.

Question 1:
How many characters have I typed in this post so far?
A- 256
B - 196
C - 336
D- Can't be bothered counting.

Question 2:
Which, of the following, is the closest in relation to a Pangolin?
A- A tape worm
B- A tapier
C- Measuring tape
D - A farmer's hat

Question 3:
How many questions are there in this quiz?
A- One
B- Three
C- Five
D- Alfragooglewak

Question 4:
Which of the following characters has not appeared in a poem on my magnificent blog?
A- Fred
B- Xark
C- Bob
D- Alfragooglewak

Question 5:
How many of this quiz's correct answers are "C"?
A-None
B- Four
C- Three
D- Alfragooglewak

Now, read the comments, add up your score, then read the section relating to you.

PEOPLE WHO SCORED 5/5:
You are very intellectual. You should be in a hospital earning a high revenue, since you attained an ENTER score of above 99.95 in High School, and spent you University time studying Medicine. Congratulations on earning such a high IQ score. Your IQ is 250.

IF YOU SCORED 4/5 FOR THIS TEST:
You are fairly smart. But why did you get that fifth question wrong? You got it wrong because you are not as good as everybody else. Go and sit in a corner and think about what you have done. Out of interest, which question was it that you got wrong? Because if it was question 5, that is terrible. That was the easiest question of them all! Your IQ is 50.

READ THIS IF YOU GOT THREE ANSWERS RIGHT:
Hi! Thankyou for doing this test. Please, now, return to you class and learn your times tables a bit better. Ok? You should not be wasting this time reading blogs when you clearly need to get a bit more cleverer. You got an IQ score of 5.

GOT TWO ANSWERS CORRECT? CLICK HERE FOR A FREE HOLIDAY TO FIJI!
You clicked on the title, didn't you? Yes, you did. I think it is time for you to take a good look at your life. You only got two right, that's less than half! Go and buy some ice cream and have some fun with your friends for a while. You deserve the break, as you must have worked very hard to read the questions of this test. You have an IQ of 1.09 x 10^-519. Sorry if you cannot understand that number.

GET ONE RIGHT?
Yay! You get right! You could smart, but you not get much right. Hard test. Hope done more good next time. Let be friend. You want be friend, too? You get eye and koo for zero.

Notice for parents: DID YOUR SON/DAUGHTER GET NO ANSWERS CORRECT?
This is a problem. This is a big problem. You have done a great job of parenting! (That was rather sarcastic) Unfortunately, your child has an IQ of negative five billion, and you should let them know that their ideal profession when they get older will be a chicken trainer.

Sorry if, in any way, your score has insulted you. Maybe next time you will get a 5/5 and feel better.

29 comments:

Jono said...

ANSWERS:

1 - D
2 - C
3 - C
4 - C
5 - B

Hope you did well!

B.C. said...

So I scored five. Win? There was a question about a Tapir in the Age Quiz today. I explained it to K as a pig-elephant with a half trunk. Fairly accurate yes?

For an amusing movie about IQ, watch this:
http://vimeo.com/218464/

some girl said...

Ok so I'm not as smart as Ben. I got three right.

D
A x
C
C
D x

Why were four of the correct answers "C"?

Is it Cant' be bothered counting?

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